Top ten things that I never thought that I would say until I was the mother of boys:

10. “You put a whole roll of toilet paper where???”
9. “Don’t eat that goat food!”
8. “Somebody unplug the vacuum….C just used it to suck up some of my hair!!” (This happened one day when I was getting stuff out from under the couch after turning the vacuum. My mistake.)
7. “You’re telling me that you got that hole in your pants by chewing it there?”
6. (In the bathroom…) “Watch where you’re pointing that thing!!!”
5. “Why in the world did you break those eggs on the couch?”
4. “What do you mean, you’re not wearing your underwear?”
3. “Please get your foot out of your mouth.”
2. “Who put chocolate syrup all over the trunk?”
1. “Please don’t eat those worms!”

I gave a little talk at a baby shower today about boys — because the mama in this case is expecting a boy. I don’t know why they asked me…the more I know boys the more that I know how much I don’t know and will never truly understand about them. I am a pretty good boy behavior predictor now, however. I meant the top ten list to be a funny ending to my little talk. My main theme of the speech was my mantra of late, “Boys take faith…..Boys take faith…..Boys take faith.” Precious little snakes, snails and puppy dog tails that they are. 🙂